March 28, 2017

Quote:

“I talk because I feel, and I talk to you because I want you to know how I feel.”

Hugh Prather in Notes to Myself

Thoughts:

I left my friend’s home red checked with embarrassment.

I talked almost non stop for thousands of hours! Lordy. What did they have to say? Did I give them even a moment to slip a word into what was not a conversation at all but was more a monologue on what it is like in Nancy’s world of one thing after another?

Feelings just pile up inside my head and all around my heart. Aimee, bless her little puppy soul, does the best she can to keep up, but sometimes even she isn’t enough. The urge to be seen, understood; land yes, hopefully agreed with, can become sky scrapper high or cavernous deep. My words just flood my inside self and burst out with gusto, filling the air all around me.

What do you do when you feel compelled to be heard?  When you are carrying inside as much as you can tolerate and it is ready to gush out into whoever’s lap and onto whoever’s shoes might be unfortunately close to hand? We all have our own unique way of managing our need to share our words: shut down even more so, fill the space with rage, cry,  go for a walk, write, paint, clean the house, go to the garden, drink, on and on. Sometimes we get a grip and tell someone who loves us that we need to talk. Or we see a therapist or a pastor. Some methods work better than others.

The bottom line, however, is that everyone needs somewhere to put their feelings from time to time and that is not only okay, it is healthy and it is what relationship is about. We listen to each other. We agree, or maybe not so much, but we listen. Because words are a gift of trust. When we share our feelings via words we are trusting that we are important enough to have time and energy and focus placed on us. What is inside is even a greater gift than what is outside. I can DO for you all day.  But it is when I listen to you that our heart and soul feels safe and desirable.

Gratitudes:

  • I am grateful for dear friends who are willing to listen to me
  • I am grateful to my realtors who today took charge and gave me great credit for being organized and on top of things
  • I am grateful my mind has not gone to overwhelm as I prepare for a For Sale sign to go up in my front yard.
  • I am grateful for all the important information I had available
  • I am grateful for all the support and help I have as I proceed with the process of moving from Toronto to Kalamazoo, Michigan
  • Love and best wishes for finding a friend who will listen, Nancy

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