November 2, 2016


“Three to 5 gratitudes written down every day for 30 days can change your attitude toward life.”

Totally a combination of Linda Graham and Nancy Ross


At the conference I attended last weekend entitled: Shift Happens: Learning to Rewire Our Responses to Disappointment, Difficulty, and Disaster, Linda Graham encouraged the daily writing of 3 to 5 gratitudes. I may have added the 30 days part, though she did say a certain amount of time; and I am not totally remembering what she said would change, but dollars to donuts, as my mother would say, it sounded something like attitude!

Linda Graham says, Harville Hendrix says, zillions of researchers and developmental psychologist and experts and very smart people say and have been saying for 20 years or more now, that we are literally hard-wired as children to behave in a certain way. We learn, because we want to survive, what we have to do to please our care takers or to get someone to do the best possible job they know how to do, so we can stay alive.

It is our limbic system, the primitive reptilian part of our brain that knows fight, flight, or freeze so as not to be annihilated. That part of the brain has been in existence since the beginning of time and has saved our lives again and again. Blessed be, for sure.

However, what worked long again may well not be working now. Once we were little and the rest of the world was big; we knew not much at all and the rest of our world hopefully had some answers. Now we too have more information and much more power. Thus, we can teach ourselves new behaviours. Behaviours that work in the world in which we are now living. When we were tiny and vulnerable the world could very easily be a very scary place. It still is scary today of course. But we have a better perspective. We can move out of harms way, we can ask for help, we can make a cup of tea and take time out, we can take a nap, read a book, listen to music, go for a walk…….and we can begin to take in the magic, the beauty, the hope that surrounds us.

Just a bit ago I wrote to a friend that being outdoors today is like being in the middle of a huge yellow sunflower. It is amazingly golden at the beach where Aimee and I walked today and I practiced using my new walking sticks that I will take to Europe with me for the purpose of not tiring so much that I become the little old lady who had to quit.

It is more than time for gratitudes. I had more to say today then I knew. Gratitudes will begin to change the early childhood hard wiring. It is absolutely scientifically researched that the brain can create new pathways. We can teach ourselves to be less afraid and to trust and have hope there is good for us in this grown up world. Try 3 to 5 daily for 30 days. Tell me if it helps.


  • I am grateful for a golden autumn day to do my stick walking practice and dog walking.
  • I am grateful for lovely texting contact and phone contact I have had with family and friends
  • I am grateful for the quiet and peace in my home
  • I am grateful for a dream that is unfolding as I prepare to move households in a year

Wishing you a golden day, Nancy

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