“……I have experienced within myself…..the desire to be more than I am at the moment-an unwillingness to let myself remain where I am-a desire to increase the boundaries of myself-a desire to do more, learn more, express more-a desire to grow, improve, accomplish, expand.”
Hugh Prather in Notes to Myself
Notes to Myself was written by Hugh Prather in 1970. Dear friends Mary and Bud gave this precious book to Carl (my children’s father) and myself as a gift. Unfortunately I am certain Carl never looked at it. But it meant a lot to me! The book spoke to me. I have the above quote underlined and in the edges have written amen.
I felt seen, heard, and understood by this lovely author. He helped me put words to the winds whirling frantically inside my head. I am feeling gentle with myself at the moment as I realize that for probably 50 years or more I have pushed myself to be more than I am at the moment. Always more. Never enough. I should have, could have, might have…..done ABC. But I didn’t do ABC. I did something else instead.
And that is what I want to say to you right now. Cherish precious you. Celebrate the XYZ that you HAVE done and brush away what you have not done. It does not matter. You are precious exactly the way you are in this very moment. And you have this moment and the next, and the next, to do something new and different……if you want to do something new and different. If you don’t want to, don’t. It does not matter. What is is perfectly fine just the way it is.
Precious you have put one foot in front of the other for your entire life and often that was not easy to do. But you did it. You are a hero. A warrior. A valiant soldier. You are brave, creative, brilliant, and if you have not lived life fully yet, you can do it right now. You can start now. Or tomorrow. Or whenever you want to start.
Let an easy gentle breeze whisper over your soul. Dream. Let go of needing. Do not cling. Do not cling to life, to breath, to hope, to joy. Do not grasp for love. All love surrounds you. You are loved and held and wanted and desired and treasured. You are a treasure. Rest in the divine comfort of being important, of mattering, of making a difference. You make a difference simply because you exist.
- I am grateful for the gift of several very old books that have dropped into my hands today
- I am grateful for the memory of wise words that once comforted me and can do just that once again today
- I am grateful for a surprising day of not planning and unfolding perfectly
Hugs, love always, Nancy