October 12, 2016


“It’s hard to swallow the fact that we have little or no say over the extent and timing of our illness.”

Kat Duff author of The Alchemy of Illness

“…..it was really fear, unacknowledged, hidden fear—-that motivated me to believe the universe made sense and that its forces were more or less within my control.”

Treya Killim Wilber


I am so very guilty of that! Of wanting to believe that stress or carelessness or something, please something, I could have done differently would have saved me from: the flu, a cold, my heart going whacko; could have saved Clo from cancer….could have, could have, whatever. And it is true, my wanting to blame illness on stress comes out of my fear of being out of control. If I control my stress, if I eat right, exercise, get good sleep, think positive thoughts, feel good about myself and my daily accomplishments, if, if, if, I will stay healthy and safe and strong and all will be just fine.

Ohh, boy. Not true. All those important things help us stay healthy and strong AND we can get very sick even so…..We/I really do not have as much control as I think I have?

I sooo do not know the answer to that. I so do believe stress contributed as least a significant part to my heart problems. And I think not feeling loved by those who should have loved her contributed greatly to Clo’s cancer and death. However, I think the key word here might be contributed. Not caused, not created, not made the illness, whatever illness it might have been. But indeed, did play a part in how severe and in the outcome. Doing all those good things I mentioned above matter. Our mind, body and soul need to be healthy and strong simultaneously for us to truly thrive.


  • I am grateful I am currently feeling relatively stress free, given the realities of the world we life in!!
  • I am grateful my morning walks with Aimee are physically comfortable for me to do
  • I am grateful for the marvellous autumn days we are having
  • I am grateful for the help I will soon receive for getting my yard ready for winter

Hugs, Nancy

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