October 28, 2016


“Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of that is the beginning of wisdom.”

Theodore Rubin as quoted in Bouncing Back by Linda Graham


Linda Graham teaches that kindness and safety are the two most important factors in healing emotional ruptures and early childhood, as well as current, wounding. Feeling safe and finding kindness in a significant other, in a friend, family member, or mentor/teacher/therapist, can help heal any pain and trauma that we have felt or are now feeling.

I am attending an excellent workshop led by Linda Graham, MFT, entitled Shift Happens: Learning to Rewire Our Responses to Disappointment, Difficulty, and Disaster. One of the many beautiful things she has to teach is: Who we are and how we cope is not our fault. We are responsible for how we cope, but we learned coping skills at a very young age, and it is not our fault if they don’t work now. We are not to blame. We are responsible for our behaviour and our responses so best we learn new ones if the old ones are no longer working. Linda Graham says we can learn to shift our attitude.

Her teaching is excellent, her book is stellar. She knows her stuff. I have a lot to learn about the brain, and she makes me want to learn it, especially from her.  She is both kind and wise and a gift to the world. Her book is easy to read and filled with excellent exercises and so much forgiveness for poor behaviour and so much encouragement to make significant changes in how we behave.

Shift Happens……we CAN shift how we respond and how we behave. Shit happens and we can still behave respectfully and with dignity and gentleness. Much more about Linda Graham and what she has to say as the weeks before us unfold.

She, by the way, encourages 3 to 5 written gratitudes daily, preferably shared with a gratitude partner!


  • I am grateful for the street car driver who helped me, with kindness and patience, find where my workshop was being held this morning.
  • I am grateful for information regarding work with veterans that I received today from a fellow workshop attendee.
  • I am grateful I made a big pot of terrific tasty soup Wednesday and it was patiently waiting for me when I got home today
  • I am grateful for the lovely sunny day and a nice walk I had at lunch break

Blessings, Nancy

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